No Regrets: Nursing Home Care

By:Michelle Remold

There are a few things that lead to the blog topic this week. I read a book, My Mother’s Hip: Lessons from the World of Eldercare by Luisa Margolies, for my Nursing Home Administration class. It was a good book and I would recommend it. I also had a few discussions that led me to this topic.

We all want to do what is best for ourselves and for those we love. The decisions aren’t always easy to make, but we have to trust we will do what is best. It could be packing up and moving to another state, deciding on which college to go to, or for the purposes of this blog, placing someone in a nursing home. It’s easy to think that once your loved one needs nursing home care that you’ll know and it will be a fairly easy transition. Pick a facility and move them in, how hard can that be? The answer is extremely hard. Not only do you have to pick a good facility, but also deal with the emotions that may accompany that transition, especially guilt.

I know it is easier said than done to not feel guilty. I know when my grandpa first went into the nursing home everyone felt guilty for having to put him there. The fact was he had sun downers and was constantly busy. It got to the point where caring for him at home wasn’t feasible any longer. They felt so guilty for putting my grandpa in the nursing home that after a few months they moved him back home; only to have to move him again. Having my grandpa in the nursing home was what was best for everyone. It kept him safe, happy, and healthy and gave everyone else a chance to regroup and not always have an eye on what grandpa was doing. While it was what was best, it still wasn’t an easy decision. I cannot imagine how hard it would be to put someone in a nursing home, but when it comes down to their safety and health and the health of the caregiver you have to do what is best.

There comes a point where one has done all they can to care for their loved one at home, but if it gets to be too much, putting them in a nursing home might be the best option. It needs to be decided what will keep them the safest and the healthiest and that might involve a nursing home. I don’t think anyone should feel guilty for making this choice;  it is made out of love and concern.

Michelle graduated from the University of Northern Iowa with her Bachelor of Arts in Gerontology: Social Sciences and a minor in Family Studies. She is currently pursuing her Master’s degree in Aging Studies and Nursing Home Administration from Minnesota State University Mankato.