Caregiving Can Be a Challenge

Caregiving is challenging no matter what side of Care you are on – Giving or Receiving.

I learned early on as a Caregiver when I perceived my role as a “Fix It Person,” my To Do list became a competitive game.  This attitude created a Win/Lose situation, and it was driven by my need to control things.

Today I approach my Caregiving “To Do List” with flexibility.  I assess three things before I proceed with any task.  Those three things are:  is the person I am providing care to 1) Safe, 2) Pain-free, and 3) Happy.  If so, I move forward with my tasks in the order of my priorities.  If not, I make some adjustments to make sure I can say “yes” to those three items.  Once I know my person is Safe, Pain-free, and Happy; I review my checklist knowing it is ok to reprioritize. I accept some things may not get completed how, when, or where I thought they would.  I have found these three words help me stay focused on what’s truly important.  It’s not about me feeling in control.  It’s about Good Care!  Funny thing is, when I am more flexible in my Caregiving Role, I am less stressed and feel more in control.

To get a tool which can help you stay on track when caring for another, go to the Resource Website Alzheimer’s Speaks and get Your Memory Chip™.  It’s free, just click on the star burst on the home page and order yours today.  Http://

Lori La Bey of Senior Lifestyle Trends

6 Replies to “Caregiving Can Be a Challenge”

  1. Great checklist Lori! We can’t control everything, and it does help to be flexible and stay focused on what’s most important.

    On a related note: senior editor, Paula Spencer recently wrote a Self Caring blog post about knowing your caregiver limits, with a reminder to fight burnout by remembering what you’re not (e.g., a robot, octopus, God, etc.): Today, she shared about sources of stress for Alzheimer’s caregivers, and how to find relief:

    Thanks for the helpful tips you’re also providing in this regard!

    1. Thanks Denise

      I appreciate you taking the time to comment and inform us on a related article. It’s so important we share information and insight with one another.

      Have a great day!


  2. Hey Lori,

    Just wanted to say hi and check in on you. Praying that your mom is comfortable.

    Take care 🙂


    1. Thanks Michelle

      Mom surprised me the other week. She was totally connected to me for about 15 minutes. It was right before I left for the lake. I think she knew I needed that connection as it had been about 6 weeks since she responded to me. I was just leaving her to go up to the lake where a man who is like my Grandpa was dying. I got to spend 3 precious hours with him before he passed. What a gift that was! Moms present to me of connecting before I left, helped me stay strong for him. Since I’ve been back home she as wormed her way back into her shell. Once again Mom was helping me realize what shows on the outside, is not always what is happening on the inside! Love you

      Thank you so much for checking in on us.


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