Living with Alzheimer’s – Day 3 Video Documentary by Rick Phelps
Rick Phelp’s Video Log, Day 3
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_9AETiskASo]
Rick has been diagnosed with Early Onset Alzheimer’s Disease EOAD. I will posting these videos as I get them from Rick. If you are interested in truly understanding what it is like to have Alzheimer’s or are caring for someone with the disease, I believe these video logs will change your life in a positive fashion.
In addition to this video sequence, Rick has also started a group called “Memory People” on facebook.
The group is for both people with Memory Loss and their Caregivers. Here is some more information on how to find “Memory People” on facebook.
1) Log into facebook
2) If you have not signed up for facebook yet, you must do this first. Once you have done this you will have a home page and can follow the directions below. To sign up for facebook, just google facebook.com and follow the directions. It is very simple to do. I did it!
3) Once you are logged in on your home page you will see a search box just left of the facebook logo and next to the little, people, comment, and world icons. You can’t miss it.
4) Type in “Memory People” and a list of groups will appear
5) Look for the drop down and click on the one that says “Memory People” and it will bring you to their page.
6) From there you can decide to join by clicking on the button that says “Join” I believe it is in the upper right corner of the page.
Very interesting, My husband has alzheimers, It amazed me that u can talk like u do. my husband goes through stages ,sometimes hardly talks, talks all the time ,tohimself. Is demanding . The dr said he should not drive.I HAVE hard time trying to entertain him. latley started shoplifting. said it was because he had alz and couldnt drive truck. he eats 3 or 4 hotfudge sundaes a day.mc donalds is 1 mile from our house and he walks or rides bicycle. people call me and say do u know Archie is walking on rode.I know u arent supose to scream, bu t i find myself doing that .He is so persistant.wont listen. thank u 4 alowing me 2 coment Dee Anna Cheney
HI Dee Anna
I am so glad you are writing. I can feel your frustration and you are not alone. I appreciate that you tookk time to write. Sometimes we just have to get it off our chest with someone who understands. i have a question for you-
Are you a member of facebook? If not I highly recommend you join and then befriend Rick Phelps or myself Lori La Bey and we will invite you to join Memory People which is a closed group for memory impaired, their caregivers and advocates of memory loss. The group is very support and I think you will find it a great relief to talk with those that “get” the disease. The group is compassionate and full of ideas tips and tools. I hope to hear from you. Take care as I can tell you have your hands full.
Lori Yes I am member, nice of u to answer my letter.Ioften feel I am not the 1 to be careing 4 him as i have no patients when he gets demanding,I want to do things 4 him, and i feel really sorry for him I know he loved to drive the truck. He said he shoplifted because he couldnt drive truck. We do have a son who helps when he can . he wanted to play shuffel board tonight sometimes he wins.they say every one is diferent. that is hard to understand.Rick talks so intelligent hard to believe he has Alz. Archie used to be so neat and orderly now exact oposit. hard to pick up after him and my self. nice chating with u. Dee Anna
HI Dee Anna
I apologize I didn’t realize you were already part of the Memory People™ group on facebook, but I am glad you have joined. As you know we are over 200 members now and it’s hard to keep track of who is who….
You are right, each person reacts differently throughout the disease process. I found with my Mother, as I look back there were definite phrases though. The worst which it sounds like you are dealing with now, is when they are aware of things changing and the loss of independence they are dealing. That is the phase Mom would get very sharp and angry. Have childish outburst from her frustrations. I don’t know if it would have helped for her to have a group to talk to others going through the same thing, but I think so. It’s always nice not to feel alone. Back then groups for people with Early Onset were not available… That is a plus today so we are making progress although slowly.
I can’t imagine for myself not being able to drive. I go nuts when I have to give them my car to do an oil change. LOL. Hopefully society will begin to embrace this disease and aging in general and start coming up with alternatives so people won’t feel such a great loss of independence. As I look back, I can also see that my reaction to Mom’s outbursts just add fuel to the fire and I found it was best for me to set back, breathe deep and control my response.
One thing that helped me greatly with my patients was to ask three simple questions before I responded or reacted to anything…. They are:
Is he SAFE?
Is he HAPPY?
Is he PAIN FREE?
They put things into perspective for me and allowed me to pick my battles. I also learned to refocus the topic via gentle changes. Some days it worked, some days not so much, but bottom line it made me much more aware of my reactions and how that triggered Moms. Knowing she couldn’t control hers sense her filters were gone, than it was left up to me to make the change. Once I had this down to a fine art and didn’t have to think about it anymore as it become natural for me, I was blessed to find out that knowing I couldn’t control her reactions, had a very calming effect on me. I was able to accept things for what they are and know all I could every do is be responsible for myself and how I chose to treat someone else. I so appreciate the peacefulness I found through this process. Good luck to you.
Lori